�and in the Dark, all Cats are grey�.� ~~B. Franklin
Ok � I have no idea where I �borrowed� this from. Probably an email from my son-in-law who gets, and passes on, the very bestest ones. And since I am definitely OVER 40 (yes, I know, I can�t believe it either) and another birthday is only 11 days away (yes, I can�t believe THAT one either) I thought I�d pass on some wisdom germane to the moment.
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Andy Rooney says: As I grow in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:
A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.
A woman over 40 knows herself well enough to be assured of who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 40 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 40 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A woman over 40 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends, because she knows her friends won't betray her.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. She always knows.
A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with them.
Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman of 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
And for all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you: "Why buy an entire pig, just to get a little sausage?"
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And, lest you think this is just modern philosophy � take a gander at an older viewpoint (Edited for space)�..
June 25, 1745
MY DEAR FRIEND:-
I know of no Medicine fit to diminish the...natural inclination you mention.....Marriage is the proper Remedy. It is the most natural State of Man, and therefore the State in which you will find solid Happiness�.It is the Man and Woman united that makes the complete Being...A single Man...is an incomplete Animal. He resembles the odd Half of a Pair of Scissors.
But if you will not take this Counsel, and persist in thinking that Commerce with the Sex is inevitable, then I repeat my former Advice that in your Amours you should prefer old Women to young ones . These are my reasons:
1. Because they have more Knowledge of the world, and their Minds are better stored with Observations; their conversation is more improving, and more lastingly agreeable.
2. Because when Women cease to be handsome, they study to be good. To maintain their Influence over Man, they supply the Diminution of Beauty by an Augmentation of Utility...hence there is hardly such a thing to be found as an Old Woman who is not a good Woman.
3. Because there is no hazard of children, which irregularly produced may be attended with much inconvenience.
4. Because through more Experience they are more prudent and discreet in conducting an Intrigue to prevent Suspicion...if the Affair should happen to be known, considerate People might be inclined to excuse an old Woman, who would kindly take care of a young Man, form his manners by her good Councils, and prevent his ruining his Health and Fortune among mercenary Prostitutes.
5. Because in every Animal that walks upright, the lower parts continue to the last as plump as ever; so that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old one from a young one. And as in the Dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of Corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal and frequently superior; every Knack being by Practice capable by improvement.
6. Because the sin is less. The Debauching of a Virgin may be her Ruin, and make her Life unhappy.
7. Because the Compunction is less...having made a young Girl miserable may give you frequent bitter Reflections;...none of which can attend making an old Woman happy .
8. 8th & lastly. They are so grateful!!!
Thus much for my Paradox. But still I advise you to marry immediately; being sincerely
Your Affectionate Friend,
Benj. Franklin
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